I continue to take my seat as the student in the whole ADHD lesson. I find myself sitting amongst a circle in a Socrates sort of way, listening to various people wax philosophical about ADHD. I’ve done my homework: read umpteen books, perused numerous websites, spoken with physicians, psychologists, other parents of ADHD or who have ADHD themselves, etc. I really should be the friggin expert here. I SHOULD be the one standing in the middle of the circle with the rest hanging on every word of profundity that passes my lips.
Yet, another day goes by and I find myself in a heap of tears wondering, “What am I supposed to do?”
I’ve come to the realization – in part by advice by some very wise women – some who have commented on this blog – that although ADHD shows up in a similar sort of way for those who have it, each child is very different. And each parent – is different. There doesn’t seem to be one answer that everyone can nod his or her head in agreement to. So I’ve taken to listening to what Super T’s mom says. She seems to know him better than anyone else, she can not only see when things are starting to get crazy, but she can sense them before they begin to surface – like a dog senses a storm coming before you even notice the dark clouds. She knows what seems make a difference (sleep, food, activity) but that sometimes there might not be a reason that makes any sense at all. What she knows is that Super T has a huge heart and he desperately wants to share it – but sometimes struggles with how.
Turns out the Shrink and I have decided it’s time to take a Sabbatical. The Shrink needs a break after 15 years in his line of work. I want a chance to focus more on our little family unit, and be less concerned about office politics, school district politics, etc., etc., etc. I want to wake up in the morning and think, “What do my kids need to learn today?” And be able to give it my full attention. So . . . crazy as we are, we are taking a year off to live on a sailboat – starting in January ’09.
We don’t delude ourselves in having a romantic picture of steady wind, sunny days, yada, yada, yada. We know it will be cramped quarters, there will be storms, frustrations, and more. We won’t be escaping life by any stretch. But it is a conscious decision to choose life, as best as we can, and live it as best as we can.
Super T’s mom thinks it is a step closer to embracing the ADHD in all of us.
I’ll keep you posted.
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3 clever remarks:
I love, love, love you.
As tears well up in my eyes at reading your post, I am reminded of a line from one of my favorite movies...
"And so [Harold Crick] did what countless punk-rock songs had told him to do so many times before: he *lived* his life."
Go. Sail around the world. Be with your family. And live your life.
Just make sure to pull into a port with cell phone service once in a while (read: once a WEEK). This is NOT a sabbatical from chattin' up your bestie. Just sayin'.
kiss, kiss.
holy sa-mokies! Wow.
Do keep us posted, if you can.
Just found your blog Googling, and wanted to say hello (researching ADD). Also, to bobita, I loved Stranger Than Fiction.
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